God always brings me a reality check when things get bad. Lately, I had been so desolate and empty feeling. I thought I was broken and unable to relate to people on a personal level. I was looking into going to counseling for my intimacy problems (for lack of a better term.). I felt like I had been spoiled by my last relationship. People were distant, unattainable, undesirable, not worth it. I felt such an overbearing apathy that life seemed pointless
Then I got a break. A small one, sure, but a break nonetheless. It restored that excitement and vigor I had felt previously. The excitement of a new person. this time I understood it might not work, and really took that to heart. And it didn't work out. I cried a little. I'm sad. But I'm happy. I'm grateful that I was given this reality check that I still have emotions, and anything can happen when you least expect it.

No one really thinks of tears as a good thing. Many people shy away from the belief in something where the believer could describe their happiest moments as ones in which they're crying. Crying isn't a sign of sadness so much as it is just a sign of emotion. Raw emotion and cleansing. Tears have been proven to remove toxins, lower stress levels, elevate one's mood, and release emotions. Bottling up and denying weakness is not healthy. Crying is a form of natural release, just like exercising or using the bathroom! People cry due to sadness, yes, but they also cry due to happiness and relief. Sometimes tears of sadness let the floodgates open, and in the clarity and shamelessness of it all, you're able to feel the happiness and humbleness they bring.

When my last relationship ended, I felt stuck. I tried to distract myself from it. I tried not to tear up, because a boy shouldn't make you cry. I felt angry. People told me he wasn't worth crying over. I should be focusing on God and not him. after that, a new idea came to me. Maybe God wanted me to just let it all out, and that was how to get over it. So I played an album we had listened to together, I played the song I heard on the radio when I first knew we had something real, I played all the songs that made me think of him and depressed me. I played them in the car, and I would bawl almost daily. I just listened to them and would cruise and tell myself how I'd been wronged. I kept this to myself, and prayed. It helped a lot. It helped me get over it much faster than I could have otherwise. Tears are good.

No one has to know you're crying. It's between you and God. So let the tears fall. you'll feel better after, I promise.