I don't have male friends. At all. Every male friendship I've ever had has gone to shit. Either I freaked him out, or started getting paranoid about him, or I simply disconnected with him, because I felt we had no need to be friends any longer.
Only one guy has ever told me he loved me. That was one of the worst experiences of my life. Not long after, we never spoke again. He didn't find me desirable in the slightest, and he was a terrible match for me. Although you could hardly call anything about it a "match", because I was not an option in his mind.
Am I too serious? Too blunt? Too funny? Not hot enough? Embarrassing? What is it? I'm not intimidating. Guy's don't talk about me at all. There is no drama associated with me, whatsoever. Could it be that? I'm simply unremarkable. And yet people think I'm a "difficult person to forget"...
That doesn't sound very comforting, either now, does it? Perhaps I'm just too weird. Maybe dating me would make the guy feel slightly uncomfortable.
Sometimes It's almost tempting to just say I'm a fricken lesbian. That would be a lot easier than trying to get guys. And I wouldn't have to be embarrassed when I have no stories about guys to share. The only story I have is a pathetic one about some internet "thing". It's not really a guy story.
I have had tonnes of feelings for guys: all unrequited. They are so beautiful. I check them out constantly. Maybe that's my problem. I'm a creep.
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